Emotional Healing While in the Midst of Abuse
Healing often feels like something that must wait until you’re free from abuse, but the truth is, emotional healing can begin even while you’re still in it.
While the situation may be beyond your control, your inner world doesn’t have to be. Healing now helps you reclaim your power, protect your peace, and build strength for whatever lies ahead.
Step 1: Separate Your Reality from Theirs
Abusers distort reality to keep control, making you question your own perceptions. Start grounding yourself in truth by:
Keeping a journal of events as they happen.
Noticing patterns of manipulation and labeling them.
Affirming to yourself: "I trust my own experiences and perceptions."
Step 2: Strengthen Your Inner Narrative
Your abuser may be telling you who you are—but you don’t have to believe it. Strengthen your inner voice by:
Repeating affirmations that reinforce your worth.
Surrounding yourself (even virtually) with voices of support.
Creating a small daily ritual that reminds you of your strength.
Step 3: Emotional Regulation in the Storm
When emotions feel overwhelming, use these techniques to calm your nervous system:
Box breathing: Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4.
Tactile grounding: Hold an object with texture, notice its details.
Movement: A short walk or stretching can shift your state.
Step 4: Build a Support System in Small Ways
You may not have a safe support network right now, but you can start creating one:
Follow empowering social media accounts.
Read survivor stories to remind yourself you’re not alone.
Identify one safe person (online or in-person) who you can talk to.
Pop into my FREE support group, or schedule a one-on-one session with me to get started.
Step 5: Find Tiny Acts of Self-Care That Are Yours Alone
Even in chaos, small acts of self-care remind you of your humanity:
Whisper kind words to yourself in the mirror.
Play music that soothes you.
Keep a small object (stone, bracelet) as a personal reminder of strength.
Even in the depths of abuse, you can plant seeds of healing that will grow into strength, clarity, and hope. You are not broken, and you are not alone.
xo, Denalee