Now that I’ve Left, How Do I Manage Triggers?

Healing after an abusive relationship is a journey filled with ups and downs, and one of the most challenging aspects can be managing triggers. A certain tone of voice, a familiar scent, or even a specific time of year can suddenly bring back overwhelming emotions.

A certain tone of voice, a familiar scent, or even a specific time of year can suddenly bring back overwhelming emotions. The good news? You can take control of your healing and reduce the impact of these triggers over time. Here’s how:

Recognize & Name Your Triggers

The first step in managing triggers is identifying them. When you feel anxious or panicked, pause and ask yourself:

• What just happened?

• What do I feel in my body?

• What memory or emotion is surfacing?

Shift Negative Thought Patterns

Triggers often bring back painful inner narratives. Instead of letting them spiral, reframe them:

• “I am safe now.”

• “That was my past, but this is my present.”

• “I have the power to choose my response.”

Create a Safe & Supportive Environment

Your surroundings can either reinforce your healing or pull you back into distress. Consider:

• Decluttering or redecorating spaces that remind you of the past.

• Surrounding yourself with people who uplift and validate you.

• Using calming scents, music, or soft lighting to create a peaceful home.

Most of all, BE KIND TO YOURSELF.

Healing is not about “getting over it” quickly. It’s about learning to live with your experiences in a way that doesn’t control you. If a trigger surfaces, don’t judge yourself. Instead, remind yourself that healing is a process.

xo, Denalee